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I wish somebody would look at my pitiful outfit and open their wallet and say, "Oh, honey, would you go shopping?"   --Deb Varani

2

Speak softly, and wear a loud shirt.  --Kimo's Rules

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I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.  --Gilda Radner

4

Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash.  --Jerry Seinfeld

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I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. I said, "Thyroid problem?"  --Emo Philips

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Don't spend $2 to dry-clean a shirt. Donate it to the Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it and put it on a hanger. Next morning buy it back for 75 cents.  --Billiam Coronel

7

I'm only wearing black until they make a darker color.

8

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just look ridiculous year after year.  --Fred Allen

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